In recent months we were fortunate enough to spend time traveling in California, Arizona, Illinois and Wisconsin. This was a bit different than our normal travels, which thanks to Uber, have become flying into the airport and going straight to the location where we are staying. Then we make satellite Uber trips to restaurants, shopping and events. This time we drove through from Arizona. We also rented a car in California and drove through northern California to Lake Tahoe. Then we drove from Chicago to and from Wisconsin, including Milwaukee and Madison. Along the way we saw a lot more of the country. Northern California, near the Sierra Nevada range, is nothing like the northern California of the Bay Area. Don’t get me wrong, we love visiting the Bay Area, the ocean views and the yummy restaurants. Most of you know that I post a lot of food pictures on social media from here and there. But my first reflection of these recent travels is that the people are more like us than different from us. You don’t really get to know that just from your Uber driver. These aren’t the major metropolitan areas of the United States, over packed with people and other problems that come with high density population centers. These are places where people drive pickup trucks, SUVs, jeeps and mountain bikes. The also hike, bike, fish, hunt and grow many of the things we like to eat.
We had a blast, but more importantly, we got to meet people. People just like you and me, and some not so much. These trips reminded me that travel can be more relational when you drive and explore. Many times, our profession can be narrowly focused and we miss out on the personal relationships.
I was reminded of something that happened when I was a young lawyer and that teaches the lesson of relationships and how important they are in our professional practice. As a young lawyer with a Mechanical Engineering degree I was given several case assignments during my first few years of practice, which were Plaintiff’s product liability cases. My first decade of practicing law was at the law firm McKinney, Stringer & Webster. I was very fortunate to be hired by Martin Stringer and to work for and with Ken McKinney and Ken Webster. Both were excellent trial lawyers and each had their own distinct style to learn from. This story involves the defense lawyer on the other side of a plaintiff’s product liability case that I worked on for Mr. Webster. That lawyer was Robert D. Looney, Sr., of the Looney Nichols Firm. All but Martin Stringer are deceased and are missed in our profession and in the community. Mr. Looney did something that he didn’t have to do which has continued to impact my practice. He and I worked the case, doing discovery and depositions and ultimately negotiating a settlement before the trial. Mr. Looney was always a gentleman, very professional and never seemed irritated by my plaintiff antics. Now mind you, this was at a time in the mid-1980s when a lot of senior lawyers were known for calling out us younger lawyers in depositions and objecting because we “did not know how to ask questions” or objecting and telling their client not to answer “until we could ask a proper question”. It was a bit of hazing to join the legal fraternity in those days. I think it was even worse for female lawyers. You could only be asked whether you were the court reporter so many times by the same lawyer without concluding that it was intentional. He was not one of those.
In any event, several days after the settlement Mr. Webster, who when you passed him by in the hallway was known for not being sure whether he would say hello or just walk on by, stopped me and asked me to come into his office. He told me that he got a call from Bob Looney, Sr. regarding my conduct during a case. I thought I was finished at the firm. However, Mr. Webster went on to tell me that Bob Looney, Sr. had called to compliment my work on the case, talked about what a good young professional I was, and how I knew how to represent my client and push when it was time to push or compromise when it was time to compromise. Mr. Looney did not have to say anything to my senior partner. However, he took the time to call and say positive things about me that Mr. Webster then called me in and praised me for. This went a long way toward my professional view of myself, what the partners at my firm thought of me and elevated my confidence. Also, I remember other interactions with Mr. Looney at the courthouse after that and always remembered the lesson that I learned from this encounter. Simply put, a kind word of praise, well placed and well timed can go a long way in building relationships. But, in order to do that, you must first reach out beyond the potentially narrow focus of your work.
So many times we treat others that we encounter only as a business obstacle without any exchange or communication that can allow for relationship building. In this profession, that we have chosen to be in, we need to treat each other better. Rather than the epitaph, he or she was a great advocate you might choose that he or she was a kind person, a mentor and a friend.
Your OCBA provides great opportunities to build those relationships. We have the Striking Out Hunger Bowling Tournament on August 15th, the Family Junction Back to School Bash on August 16th and the Raising the Bar Annual OCBA Dinner Dance on September 20th (Mark your calendars). We are also planning a December year-end CLE celebrating the Foundations of the Civil Justice System and the Independent Judiciary.
Byline: Michael W. Brewer is an attorney, founder, and partner of Hiltgen & Brewer, PC in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. To contact Mike, email mbrewer@hbokc.law, call (405) 605-9000 or tweet him at @attymikeb. For more information, please visit http://www.hbokc.law. 
Open & Obvious? 