Your OCBA held its Annual Awards Luncheon in July where we honored many fifty- and sixty-year veterans of the bar and multiple others for their contributions to your OCBA. This was the first large gathering of the OCBA in over a year and a half. Event attendance was 320+ strong for food and a reunion of sorts. I observed and engaged in more handshaking and hugs than I had in the last year and a half. Note, that I did make an assumption that those in attendance were vaccinated. We lawyers are a social group despite what others may say.
The great thing about the OCBA Annual Awards Luncheon is that members from all practice areas of the bar and the judiciary meet and break bread together as a family. All ages from legal interns and new lawyers to octogenarians were represented. It was a great time as I’m sure you’ll see from the photographs in the Briefcase. I hope that you’re there for the next OCBA gathering and that we have many more opportunities in 2021.
This reminded me that several months ago I made a statement in the Briefcase that I was going to be intentional about relationships in 2021 and not just work at our profession for billable hours, fees, or results. As a professional, results are important to your client goals and to your labors. However, we can’t lose sight of individual relationships developed and their importance to our profession. My goal was to touch base with attorneys whom I’ve crossed paths with over the decades. I have managed to eat lunch, breakfast, or meet for a cup of coffee every week with a different friend since I started this intentional quest. It’s difficult to find time in the schedule, especially when 2021 seems to be filling up with 2020 dockets and even 2019 dockets, but let’s not use that as an excuse. I have been fortunate enough to meet with lawyers that I hired out of law school and haven’t seen in quite some time. I’ve also met with opposing counsel from decades of litigation. I’ve shared coffee with mentors and mentees alike. It has been good for me to be social again and to rekindle old friendships. After 2020 isolation, I believe we all missed this part of our professional lives. I know that meeting with these people has enriched and blessed my life in many different ways.
I’ve also learned a lesson on conversation starters. I started out going into these by asking – How are you really doing? It’s crazy, but learned that you don’t have to ask that question to reengage an old friend. You simply need to be present and discuss whatever each of you chooses to discuss. I’m not a psychiatrist or social worker, but – how are you doing – isn’t necessarily the best way to start a conversation. Simply catching up is a great way to start. How are you doing seems to imply a mental health concern. Mental health concerns in our profession are real and especially significant post 2020 COVID isolation. This inquiry may be a next step and should be considered, but only if everyone involved is open to that level of discussion. This comes with a warning. If you engage someone, you should be ready to follow up and be there later if needed. If you say you’re going to do something, do it.
As a profession, we don’t do well in isolation or without support. Be ready to provide that for someone else, and you will get it in return. If you’re not reaching out to friends new, present, or old, then make sure you’re at the next OCBA event where a group of colleagues and acquaintances who will soon be your friend, can be found. I look forward to seeing you there and hope that lots of handshakes and hugs will ensue.
Byline: Michael W. Brewer is an attorney, founder, and partner of Hiltgen & Brewer, P.C. in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. To contact Mike, email mbrewer@hbokc.law, call (405) 605-9000 or tweet him at @attymikeb. For more information, please visit www.hbokc.law.
Open & Obvious? 